A Newbie Shares His Experience (Review of Shirley @ Chang Holistic)

[brandy]

So...I didn't know if I should post this or not...given that she / they have SO MANY reviews...and such a strong and loyal following. Ultimately I decided to go forward with it, since there might be some guy out there who like me is totally new to all this, and has expectation similar to mine, and accordingly dissimilar to most of you.

So...as you may have read here...

http://www.massageplanet.net.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=200946

...I had decided to give the MPA thing a try as an alternative to all the fucking around I typically do, as I am TRYING to actually give this (semi) monogamy thing a shot.

And..as you may have read here...

http://www.massageplanet.net.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=201160

..I have had one experience so far, and while QUITE pleasant, it wasn't exactly what I had in mind.

So...based on the many and strong recommendations of my fellow massageplanet.netites (am I a member of the club yet? Because my going to strip clubs didn't seem to count for many people...) I decided to pay Shirley / Chang's a visit.

I called early (11:00am) the morning I wanted to make my visit, and secured an afternoon appointment. Based on my previous experience of arriving exactly on time and finding my host not exactly ready, along with Shirley telling me in advance she had an appointment before me, I didn't hustle and was in fact about 15 minutes late. It turns out Shirley had been expecting me to be on time - in fact she called my home to follow up when I did not arrive at the appointed hour (her message was very discrete, and I live alone, so there was no issue...I mention this just so that YOU are aware this could happen). Chang's is a located in a Class "C" office park, with a very discreet presence. Parking however is an issue....there are a limited number of spots. I am not exactly sure what guidance to give you here, as there is no street parking...

The facility itself is quite clean - not exactly super modern or world class, but I had already adjusted my expectations down from what I might see at an upscale resort spa based on my last experience. Shirley herself pretty much fit the picture I had in mind when I started this...a not at all unattractive woman, but CLEARLY not 23 years old either. I myself do not have a particular attraction to Asians (not saying anything is wrong with them...saying they don't get my blood boiling like Latinas and big booty white gurls...), but I could see how if a guy was married to an Asian and hence attracted to them, he might think "man...I sure hope my wife looks that good when she is that age...."...as in she looked GREAT for her age...but her age was no secret.

I was instructed to shower (instructed...versus Sarah who offered the option), and thinking that perhaps a failure to do so might negatively impact my experience, I did, despite the fact that the shower was such that had I felt I had a choice, I would have passed. That said, I am a bit of a germaphobe...trust me, had it been REALLY bad I would NOT have gotten in, so you might not have any issue at all. There was a mix up on my part regarding the use of the towels / robe / whatever....it seems as though people in this industry assume their client knows the protocol already, and are familiar with the drill. Whatever...I just worked my way through it.

Once on the table Shirley asked what sort of massage I had experienced before...and as a reflex I answered the question honestly (plenty of RMT work for my football injuries, a fair amount of papering at various upscale SPAs...), then it occurred to me that this might be a "test"...so I tossed in at the end that I had also been to a few '"exotic spas". I have no idea if she believed me or not...lol.

Once things began, I was...disappointed. Shirley was clearly providing a "therapeutic" massage...one apparently based on some storehouse of knowledge (knowledge that I cannot verify the veracity of...) and just as clearly not intended to be erotic. To make things worse, Shirley seemed to be ignoring my comments that she was being rougher than I'd like (normally I DO like a good hard massage...when that is what I've come for...) and she was talking the entire time. Definitely nothing "sensuous", "erotic" or particularly calming going on here. I am starting to worry...is there some secret password or something I am supposed to utter?

I do my damnedest to send hints regarding what I want...every time she goes near my ass I moan...every time she goes near my inner thigh I spread my legs further apart...nothing seems to work. And she keeps working my muscles too hard. And she won't shut up. What happen to this "oasis of pleasure" that I was supposed to drifting off to? I mean...she does have the artificial birds and shit going in the background...

Then...it happens. After about what I would guess was 30 minutes...she starts touching me in a way that I am DEFINITELY agreeable with. Ahhhh.... she asks if I like...I do my best to convey I do with a mumbled and breathless "oh yes". Maybe if I show her I am really in to it, it gets better. She makes some moves towards my anus and I again do my best to send signals...YES, YES....this is MORE THAN OK! FEEL FREE! GO AHEAD!...but nothing exceptional takes place. Still, the way she is playing piano all over my legs and back does not suck...and it is having the intended effect.

Then comes the order to turnover. I do, and the "fun" begins. And...it is accompanied by an added bonus...seems Shirley has a "sound track" she likes to share with her clients (I know she didn't come up with that just for me). An attractive woman talking dirty while she touches me in ways and places no man ever has...or ever will...ok...this is what I came for. Except...

It seems all so...scripted. Mechanical. Like she has done this all hundreds of times before...which of course she has. She asks if I'd like a prostate massage as well...I again do my best to convey that YES, this is what I came for. But again...it isn't erotic or sensual...at least not to me.

Now...just as a normal course of things...I am pretty much a "long distance runner" kinda a guy. Premature ejaculation has NEVER been a problem for me...indeed I have the opposite problem. Add to that the fact that I am not feeling particularly aroused...I mean, yeah, I'm erect, but my head is not into it...and things are not progressing very fast. And Shirley does not seem to be happy about this...she is definitely giving off a "this is more work than I was looking for" type of vibe. Finally, I decide to take over...nobody knows how to do me better than me, so I figure we should just get this over with. And after a few more minutes...we do.

A clean up follows...I am offered water. Shirley leaves the room, so I take it that is my hint to dress...but when she doesn't return, I assume I am supposed to go find her...which I do..prone on a table, receiving a massage herself. Oh man...I guess I really WAS more work than she signed up for.

She pops off the table and comes toward me with a very apologetic tone (seems she thought I was asleep). I note the time and the sign on the wall, see that I owe the woman $85, and accordingly hand her $100. I think I have been generous. It seems I have not been...it turns out that a prostate massage...the prostate massage that actually never happened ("you are very tight" she apologized...isn't that why they invented lube? I'm sorry that I don't have a bung hole like a Church street club boy...) cost an extra $20.

So...let's review. $120 for a massage I didn't want, some self administered "self love" (exactly opposite of what I came for...I thought she was supposed to have some ancient Asian secret knowledge of how to make men revert to childhood with pleasure...you know, goo goo, ga ga....was that a bad assumption?), and a prostate massage that didn't actually happen.

Repeat? What do you think?

Sigh.....this might not be for me. I had a great time with Sarah...and now that we have communicated, she should be better equipped to deliver on my intended experience. And I guess now I have to give Lucy / Angela a try. But I am $270 in the hole, and haven't' yet gotten what I was looking for. And now the police are busting these places left and right?

You know, I am REALLY not the sort of guy who needs to have a "relationship" with someone to enjoy intimacy. If ever there was a man whore...I am him.

But...I am coming to understand that the "dance" is important me...the protocol / process / ritual that gets us into bed...be it measured in weeks, days, or hours. This pay to play thing just doesn't seem to be engaging my seductive mind enough. I mean...I can jerk myself off for a lot cheaper...where is the tease...where is the mind fuck?

Maybe I am not a hobbyist after all....

 

[nitwig//0]

I think that's the point: she has done it thousands of times before. I saw her early days and it was very much erotic. Now it just might be a decent massage and that's that.

 

[Dilligas]

MPAs would like to see clients who return, those who make it a routine to see them but when an MPA gives service like it is a routine for her this discourages the customer from seeing her on a routine bases.

I agree that Shirley gives a good theraputic massage but even that has become uninspired. She is not bad but she does tend to forget that each visit experience determines if that client will come back again.

I know she has lots of fans here and she does deserve them, but like the poster experienced I also found her becoming too routine. I know its easy to say this from a clients perspective since we are not having to see clients every day like she has to but that is what we give here is a clients perspective.

 

[Dan W]

I've been to Changs more then a few times but have never seen Shirley, I don't specifically ask for her so she always pawns me off on someone else.

Last time I went a few weeks ago she was training two new girls on me which wasn't as good as it sounds. Made me realize how good Juliet actually was in comparison to the one that stayed for the end. You probably would have had a better time with her MLAM but I think she is gone for good. I probably won't be returning for a while, was also considering trying out Lucy or Angela @ Mt pleasant.

 

[Pompal 09.]

Ive seen shirley many times and she does not come close to Lucy .

ahhhhhhh lucy !

 

[confusedcannary]

good review. it is probably one of the more honest reviews I have read in a while. It is more reflective than negative. Thanks

 

[Little Miss Missy]

Shirley really is just about the massage.

The "soft massage" and release at the end is just a "extra" above and beyond what you would get with a "real" RMT

Amy (formerly of Changs, and now on her own at www.amytherapy.net )
is exactly the same...and it does get a bit boring if you are expecting anything else other than must a massage an a manual release.

Although...when I used to see Amy at her apartment, she was much more liberal in terms of touching and lack of "attire". Now that she has her office, she's all business.

It sounds like you need to skip the MP phase of the hobby, and move right into seeing SP's. Someone like Molly Robinson...you have flirted with her in a thread that I read, and it appears she really turns your crank. Smart and sexy. Or a Dani.

 

[Griffyn]

MLAM......

Go see LUCY.....

I should be her freakin' agent.

$40 for what is always a very long 30 minutes -- everything you seemed to want at Changs but didn't get. She's not eye candy -- but is still the best.

B

 

[GirlieGirl]

it's a good review.

What I learned years in the massage world is that like everything else it's a microcosm of life.

Some mp ladies and mp's agreed with me and some didn't. massageplanet.netites raved endlessly about Sydney, for me she was insufferably boring and about the only mpa I felt I had to ask if she wasn't going too far, and her upsell prattle had me wondering if I'd survive if I asked for a replacement mid session. Same for our loved/bashed Violet, lovely funny girl, boring awkward massage. Everyone dismissed nattydread Brooke but for me she was Cecilia's equal. massageplanet.netites endlessly panned Eden and airport/whispers/brandy's but I had great times there.

So, probably, it's the sum of individual experiences including the intangibles between you and her; not necessarily or conclusively the massageplanet.netite hype.

 

[Ron Brgundy]

ROFLMAO - very entertaining read... Thanks for this! My first time - I blew my load as quickly as she jerked a few times, but now I get close to blue-balling...