massage and gentlemans clubs

[Maria G]

my fiance is a new, passionate, professional massage therapist that genuinely wants to use her skills to help improve people lives

however, we both also enjoy visiting gentlemans clubs together

how will this hurt her reputation? can a massage therapist be taken seriously if she is spotted at an establishemnt like this?

 

[SLipknOT FTW]

Hmmmm, I'm not exactly sure of the definition of "gentleman's club" but I get the impression it is a little "unsavoury"

I have found that a lot of massage therapists I know in my area are more alternative than your average group of people. It seems to be more acceptable to frequent a different array of clubs for various recreational activities.

I think, that if she meets someone at a club, my thoughts are, they are both there for the same reason. I would hope it doesn't reflect on her as a massage therapist. She may need to keep her boundaries much firmer, and be much clearer than the average therapist if it is a club of a sexual nature. People do and will get the wrong idea, so she may find herself defending herself more often. Hopefully not.

I have been told by a friend of mine who frequents alternative clubs, that she has had to put her foot down, and sometimes explain to people that just because she is there has absolutely no bearing on her profession, and often doesn't even tell people what she does so they don't get confused.

Just remember, the other people are there for the same reason you are, and probably have well respected jobs as well.

 

[Vemsteele]

well i am referring to stip clubs specifically...

however, we have visited "alternative lifestyle clubs" before, although we didnt really care for them too much

...interested on hearing opinions for both situations

 

[2010 :)]

On a couple occasions I've been out with friends at a bar, and been asked what I do. I simply tell them "I'm in health care" and turn the question back on them, or change the subject.

It's not that I'm embarrassed or uncomfortable with what I do, but unless I'm actually interested in getting to know the person... it cuts down on the goofballs with the immature thoughts.

If I were to run into a client there, it wouldn't matter much since we're both at the same place for similar reasons lol.

 

[MEZA!]

Alternative clubs and adult related venues generally have the same interest clientele and many times people will use an alias in these areas.

I think as a rule d/t boundary issues it would not be in your best interest to tell others you were an MT while attending these venues nor to solicit clients through this medium.

That said, I know a massage therapist who does not have a problem letting her adult community friends know her real name, her profession and will work on these personal aquaintances on a professional level.

I, however, believe it makes a lot of sense to refer these adult related individuals out to another therapist if you decide to mention your profession.

how will this hurt her reputation? can a massage therapist be taken seriously if she is spotted at an establishemnt like this?

There is always the possibility that she may be seen as an MT who provides unprofessional services, if someone sees her at an adult establishment (even if her personal life has nothing to do with her professional life). You may want to consider how you are willing to deal with it if it becomes an issue.

 

[vlost1]

Sounds very iffy to me. She will have to be a strong individual to deal with the outcome, like previously posted.

Personally I wouldn't even go into a porn shop, what if I ran into a client! Or worse, my mom or dad! : But that is a whole other topic not worth discussing here.

 

[Caramel Eyes]

I would imagine that an clientele that meet her there are unlikely to worry about the fact that she goes there, and how likely are her other clients to find out anyway? She could always find a place quite a bit away from where she practices to frequent.

Having said that, I know an MT that is paranoid about her female clients finding out she is bisexual - she feels that they may stop coming out of worry over her 'intentions' - despite the fact she is a talented and professional therapist.

My guess is some will mind, most won't. IMO someone's sexual preferences are not a factor in their qualities as a professional massage therapist - just as they wouldn't be in my dentist or shopkeeper.

 

[Vicki]

Does she go to these venues with a big sign on saying "I'm a new, passionate, professional massage therapist"?
Do you know the profession of most of the other people frequenting the club? I would imagine that for most of the clientele they are not interested in the other patrons in the club, they're interested in the performance aspect of their time there. So unless she goes to such venues with a big sign, and she would probably need to be wearing skimpy clothing and have flashing lights around the sign for it to be noticed, I think she is reasonably safe. Is there much social mixing among the clients in the club?

I wouldn't use such a club as a venue to find new clients, too confusing for them (and that goes for the customers and the workers). If her profession ever needs discussion JaeMarie's "I'm in health care" is a nice neat way of avoiding mentioning the M word.

Now if your fiance is hoping to find new clients in such a venue, there are a few threads along those lines if you need them dug up.

In social situations, I generally avoid mentioning the M word. Lots of people recommend starting out working on friends and family and get them to spread the word about you, but the dual relationship of freinds/client can get rather complicated, particularly for a new therapist. Easiest way to avoid the problem is don't expect people you meet in social situations to be possible clients, so no need to try and get business in social situations. Once she is more established and has more experience with boundaries, she may want to try looking for clients in social environments, but I wouldn't recommend doing it in a club for a while.

 

[ggaryusa]

:iagree:
That's exactly what I've been thinking; most people aren't going to know you are an MT. Now if by some circumstance she runs into a client or a friend of a client, honestly it shouldn't matter what she does in her personal life. Something like visiting a gentlemen's club should have no reflection on her professional life.