Review Yo So Big, and more Humour

Albertaman

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Should be posting this in Edmonton forum as there is an active community of hobbyists there, but since the first note came up in a massage session in Calgary, here goes:

What are some of your funniest moments in this hobby?

So here I was in a recent semi-legit massage situation. Third time with the Asian therapist. Good therapeutic massage the first two times, with a pleasant amount of teasing before and after the flip, and a relaxing HJ in the last 15 minutes each time. Second visit advanced to some consensual mutual touching, pleasing. On this third visit, after the flip it got hot and heavy. Her pants and panties are off, my fingers stroke her wetness. Her eyes have an inquiring look above her mask. Hear her ask: Condom? Fortunately, I had one in my jacket pocket. Get off the table and get the condom. No discussion on pricing etc. She holds my cock in her two small hands and whispers the classic line, Yo So Big. I slip the condom on. After some more finger foreplay on her, get her positioned on the edge of the table. And then insert the tip of my cock into her. She gasps. I play gently in her, only with the tip inserting a bit, withdrawing, rocking in and out. She has a happy look in her eyes, mask covering any other expressions. But it alternates with a look of pain each time I thrust the tip into her a bit deeper. Her right arm comes up, and then with her fingers she gestures a measurement, and I hear her say "Two Inches, Please".

I didn't know whether I should laugh or cry, but being a gentleman, I made the best of it. Keeping the rest of the session limited to rocking thrusts no deeper than 2" certainty prolonged the activity, and I sensed that due to her 'tight condition', anything deeper could indeed be unpleasant for her. All in all it turned out ok, and she moaned and quivered throughout. I just haven't decided if I will repeat or not. TWO INCHES Please.
To her credit, she did not ask for any specific tip, leaving that to me. Certainly one of the funniest experiences in years. And a novel one for sure.

Share your funny experiences.



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I had a similar experience with a very tight Chinese lady about two years ago, two inches deep and two inches wide was her limits. Will not repeat - took all my efforts to get the head through the gate - kinda like reverse childbirth…..
 
I don’t have any FS experiences as I don’t partake. I have had one woman talk about the “baby” when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didn’t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super “superman” was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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I don’t have any FS experiences as I don’t partake. I have had one woman talk about the “baby” when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didn’t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super “superman” was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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Umm, more contact details if you can please!
 
I don’t have any FS experiences as I don’t partake. I have had one woman talk about the “baby” when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didn’t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super “superman” was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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that's a great one. Probably somewhat of a break from giving deep massages that require a lot of effort. Long time ago, used to have a Russian therapist who used to break up a 90 minute massage into three periods, each ending with a SOG. Never asked her if she was a hockey fan.


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that's a great one. Probably somewhat of a break from giving deep massages that require a lot of effort. Long time ago, used to have a Russian therapist who used to break up a 90 minute massage into three periods, each ending with a SOG. Never asked her if she was a hockey fan.


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Gives a new meaning to “pulling the goalie!”
 
It would be really difficult not to go past the 2 inch limit !! Must have taken a lot of concentration on your part.
I would be wanting to giver her the whole 3 inches !!! Lol.
 
It would be really difficult not to go past the 2 inch limit !! Must have taken a lot of concentration on your part.
I would be wanting to giver her the whole 3 inches !!! Lol.

It took all of my early life training as a Buddhist monk to remain within the requested space. The greatest liberation of body, mind, and soul occurs during confinement. Decided, I will visit again.


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I had a similar experience with a very tight Chinese lady about two years ago, two inches deep and two inches wide was her limits. Will not repeat - took all my efforts to get the head through the gate - kinda like reverse childbirth…..

A lot of Chinese massage girls are great actresses. Great lines like :” oh - you’re so big!“
‘“i never do this before “.
“you are too big - just go in a little”.
“Oh baby, you making me come “.
“ i only do this for you “
”this is the first time i do this !”
etc.
 
A lot of Chinese massage girls are great actresses. Great lines like :” oh - you’re so big!“
‘“i never do this before “.
“you are too big - just go in a little”.
“Oh baby, you making me come “.
“ i only do this for you “
”this is the first time i do this !”
etc.

The familiar lines are exactly that. Part of the act. You missed... You So Thick

But don't forget, we are all getting older. Hormonal shifts. Greater challenges for some ladies. Best to be respectful.


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100% agree with get getting older and respect comment, starting to take all night to do what I used to be able to do all night.
 
A lot of Chinese massage girls are great actresses. Great lines like :” oh - you’re so big!“
‘“i never do this before “.
“you are too big - just go in a little”.
“Oh baby, you making me come “.
“ i only do this for you “
”this is the first time i do this !”
etc.

They BEST part is , Most guys believe them :lol
 
They BEST part is , Most guys believe them :lol

Let's face the facts. The illusion is part of the experience. Focused attention, and temporary suspension of reality. The mini vacation. False is real, Real is false. If it were to be just about massage, most people would invest in a high end massage chair, and be done with it. And also, if you happened to turn into a fly, and remained in the room with your favourite semi-legit therapist for an entire 12 hour work day, I bet you would never be seeing her again. We all repeat because we buy into some of the lies, the illusion. Fake is Real. Real is Fake. The Real, Real is pretty Ugly.


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I don’t have any FS experiences as I don’t partake. I have had one woman talk about the “baby” when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didn’t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super “superman” was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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Can we get contact info for the lady that did 4 times?
 
Shoutbox
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  15. Jenny’s Spa:
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  22. Lulu1980:
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  24. Endless Joy Spa:
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  25. Pink Flower Spa:
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  26. Endless Joy Spa:
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  27. Jenny’s Spa:
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  28. Sparkling Spa:
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  29. Annie Spa:
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  30. Lily Spa:
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  31. Red Rose Spa:
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  32. MoonM203:
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  33. KSpa:
    FRIDAY at 𝐊 𝐒𝐏𝐀: HELEN, SUKI & CINDY. Unit B6-4227 Sheppard Ave East Scarborough, ON (Just East of Midland Ave) ☎️ 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟳𝟵𝟮-𝟳𝟱𝟲𝟴 ☎️ HELEN is a pretty Chinese babe, 24, 5’3” & 115 Lbs, can provide good services. SUKI is 23, 5’2” & 100 Lbs, 34C with a slim & sweet sexy body. CINDY is slim & pretty with a 5’3” sexy body, big boobs 34D, and a nice curvy bum. Cindy can relax all your cares
  34. SugarLoveSpa:
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  35. Moneylee:
    All season wellness center : New Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Mia ,young girl pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Sonia,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Yoyo,Young girl Big breasted saucy naughty Ella ,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Sherry 🏠address: #5-30 Rambler dr Brampton ,Ontario L6W 1E2☎️4376655510 🦵🦵👄👄🈵🈵👅👅
  36. Moneylee:
    Full season wellness center: New Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Cici , Young girl pretty face big boobs nice figure deep massage Jessica ,Young girl Big-breasted big Big boobs big butts May, Young beautiful face sexy body and good deep massage Maggie,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Mary . 🏠 2560 Shepard Ave Mississauga unit 1 ☎️ 4379857899 👄👄🦵🦵🈵🈵👅👅
  37. SunriseRH:
    FRIDAY at 𝗦𝗨𝗡𝗥𝗜𝗦𝗘 𝗦𝗣𝗔: JUDY & SUMMER. 10 East Wilmot St, Unit 27, Richmond Hill, on ☎️ 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟯𝟮𝟱-𝟴𝟬𝟴𝟲 ☎️ JUDY is a young & attractive Chinese girL, lwho knows exactly how to please a man. SUMMER is an incredibly sweet Asian babe, 5’3” with a captivating 36D-28-39 figure, weighing 108 pounds. Summer has very good massage & services.
  38. NewOriental:
    FRIDAY at 🍏💚𝗡𝗘𝗪 𝗢𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗔𝗟 𝗦𝗣𝗔💚🍏: HAPPY, LULU & PHOENIX. 10 East Wilmot St, Unit 26, Richmond Hill, on ☎️ 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟯𝟴𝟭-𝟮𝟲𝟴𝟴 ☎️ HAPPY is a slim & busty Korean lady with great massage skills & lots of extra fun. LULU is a friendly and very sexy Vietnamese girl with natural B Cups, and a slim to medium frame. She is a lot of fun, and can be wild at times.
  39. ASPA:
    𝗙𝗥𝗜𝗗𝗔𝗬 𝗮𝘁 𝗔 𝗦𝗣𝗔: 𝗔𝗺𝘆 & 𝗯𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗺𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗮𝗴𝗲 𝗥𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗹 🅰️𝐀 𝐒𝐏𝐀🅰️, 28 South Unionville Ave, Unit 5, Markham. 🅰️𝗖𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟳𝟮𝟵-𝟲𝟲𝟬𝟲 𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟴𝟯𝟵-𝟱𝟵𝟲𝟲🅰️ AMY is young and very friendly, standing 158 Cms. with 34C Cups and a very nice bum. Amy is a very popular student, young, sexy, and open minded. She is in demand for her good massage
  40. Dreaminn:
    FRIDAY at 💭𝗗𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗠 𝗜𝗡𝗡 𝗪𝗘𝗟𝗟𝗡𝗘𝗦𝗦 𝗦𝗣𝗔💭: CANDY, LULU & TINA. 10225 Yonge St (North of Major Mackenzie), Richmond Hill, ON ☎️ 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟴𝟮𝟵-𝟮𝟵𝟴𝟯 ☎️ *New Girl Today: CANDY is an attractive Chinese girl, mid 20’s, 167Cms & 110 Lbs with D Cups and very versatile menu. LULU is a very popular & well known Chinese attendant, slim and beautiful with 34C Cups, long sexy legs, and incredible services.
  41. HolidaySpa:
    Friday at 🌴😎🌅𝓗𝓸𝓵𝓲𝓭𝓪𝔂 𝓢𝓹𝓪🌅😎🌴3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough ☎️𝟰𝟯𝟳-𝟮𝟰𝟳-𝟭𝟭𝟵𝟵☎️Cindy, Lina & New Girl Maya Cindy is a slim & incredibly sexy lady with a smile that will melt your heart, & an ass that will fire up your spirit. Her services are among the best! Lina is very well known for her great services and her impressive shapely ass. Come and see why! You will be glad you did.
  42. Lulu1980:
    Good morning guys, Phoenix Blossom Spa♨️♨️♨️Table shower body scrub👍👍👍3 girls every day, new girl Emily sexy beauty super service, body slide, professional Thai massage technique👌👌👌 Mia sexy body very good body slide.Cici super deep tissue massage🔥🔥🔥5124Dundas St W Etobicoke☎️416-817-3366
  43. bnwellness_wilson:
    Blue Nile Wellness Center, we have 4 young beautiful girls are working today, young pretty Sally 30’s and young fun Ivy 30’s with big buttocks , pretty GFE Lina and young sweet Tina with curves body open mind are providing deep tissue and sensual massage, pls call 416-3985777 book appointment and walk in aways welcome, back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
  44. ForeverWarden:
    Friday at 🫦❤️🔴🟥♾️𝓕𝓞𝓡𝓔𝓥𝓔𝓡 𝓢𝓟𝓐♾️🟥🔴❤️🫦 2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough 𝟰𝟭𝟲-𝟴𝟬𝟬-𝟳𝟴𝟴𝟳: Cindy, Mia, Nana & Sasa. Cindy is a slim beauty, 5’4”, natural C Cups & wonderfully long nipples. Her massage is nice, her bbbj will drive you wild & her cfs finish is a dream come true. Mia is a Caribbean service queen temptress with incredible curves & very friendly attitude. She is able to bbbj like a queen
  45. Red Rose Spa:
    🌸 We have 5 hot brown girls today 🌸 NINSH, MALIYA, SANA, AMANDA, MIMI, ANAYA, KIRAN, SARIKA 🌸 2588 Birchmount 🌸 2 Invergordon 🌸 647-702-8800 🌸 Please visit for a great erotic massage
  46. vrporn1007lover:
    prostate
  47. Flowers Spa:
    ┆B l u e X a d o S p a┆ 416 357 9797 ✰ 𝟷𝟷𝟶𝟸 𝙲𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚛𝚎 𝚂𝚝 , 𝚄𝚗𝚒𝚝 #𝟼 , 𝚃𝚑𝚘𝚛𝚗𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚕. Candy | Mimi (New) 19Yrs Vietnamese beautiful face, friendly...Must See...Monica (New) Colombian Thailand, beautiful & shapely...Excellent Service....After 9PM Hanna from Vietnam pretty, medium body, also does lighter treatment with emphasis on service... ┆B l u e X a d o S p a┆416 357 9797 ✰ 𝟷𝟷𝟶𝟸 𝙲𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚛𝚎 𝚂𝚝 , 𝚄𝚗𝚒𝚝 #𝟼 , 𝚃𝚑𝚘𝚛𝚗𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚕.
  48. Lulu1980:
    Good morning guys, Phoenix Blossom Spa♨️♨️♨️Table shower body scrub👍👍👍3 girls every day, new girl Vicky sexy beauty super service, body slide, professional Thai massage technique👌👌👌 Cici super deep tissue massage🔥🔥🔥5124Dundas St W Etobicoke☎️416-817-3366
  49. Endless Joy Spa:
    ✨✨✨✨✨[GRAND OPENING]✨✨✨✨✨ 💞Endless Joy Spa💞 🎇 (155 East Beaver Creek Rd Unit #8, Richmond Hill) 416-731-8565🎇10am-2am, Young Sexy Curvy Latina Karen, Young Sexy Slim Chinese Emma, Young Slim Thai Janice, Young Sexy CBC Rachel. Slim Sexy Chinese Kiki, Tall Slim Sexy Chinese Kelly, Young Sexy Chinese Abie.
  50. Red Rose Spa:
    🌸 We have 5 hot brown girls today 🌸 LUCY, MALIYA, NISHA, AMANDA, ANAYA, MAY, SANA, ANGEL 🌸 2588 Birchmount 🌸 2 Invergordon 🌸 647-702-8800 🌸 Please visit for a great erotic massage
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