Spawarrior99
Reviewer
You know what bust a pimple. I have a few tweaks to your theories...And here's why I gave a shit emoji..YMMV
Alright so there's been a lot of banter lately about YMMV. So i figured why not make a post. Some people get a lot, some people get next to nothing. Here's my tips over the years that have got me extra mileage. A lot of which I did not ask for as it happened organically. Either by me going in instigating the action or the mpa just doing it.
1) BE IN SHAPE
Guys, there's no excuse for being fat and out of shape. I've said this a million times on here. Being in great shape gets you extra play all day everyday. I would go as far to say that 90% of the time an mpa is shocked when my shirt comes off. It's like she's never seen a well sculpted body before. I'm talking eyes popping out of her head. This tells me that the majority of the guys going into spas are not in shape. I'm a little older now but i train a lot. It's part of my daily regime. It should part of yours too, not just for this hobby but for life in general. If you guys lack motivation, or need an extra push. Workout with a friend or hire a trainer. I've always been a gym rat since i was young. In my case now, i have this young lad who works for me. He is in insane shape as he workouts like crazy. We train together and push each other every time at the gym.
Let's be honest, no guy wants a fat lard ass mpa. In retrospect no mpa wants a fat lard ass mandem. That's just fkn gross all around. There's a lot of things we can't control, like our height, aging etc but you can control your weight. Having a fit body is the ultimate sign of self respect.
2) HYGIENE
Yes, fkn hygiene. When you guys go to a spa, shower right before you go. I'm talking right before, like shower and head straight to the spa right after. I don't like to shower at spas before a session. The reason for this is that, I don't like their cheap ass soap. A lot of the spas don't even have body lotion for crying out loud. So i use the quality stuff i have at home before i head out. I only shower after sessions at the spa and even then the idea of how many people being in there just fkn grosses me the fk out.
Brush your mother fkn teeth before a session. Holy fk, i can't even believe i have to say this one. You know how many girls i've spoken to over the years who have said so many guys they see have bad breath. Brush, , use mouth wash and chew a piece of gum on your way to the spa. I don't recommend flossing for those of you who like to go down on a chick for obvious reasons.
Spray a good cologne. None of this shoppers drug mart cheap ass shit. The good shit. This hobby is expensive so invest in a good cologne. I like creed aventus, baccarat rouge 540, and le labo te matcha just to name a few. Don't fkn over spray, two or three sprays max.
Groom yourself. If you're a hairy ass chewbacca mother fker get the manscape trimmer and get to work. You don't have to go zero guard. For those of you who have small dicks leave enough hair so your dick seems bigger. LOL!!!... but don't leave too much where the mpa has to go searching for moby.
For those of you who have been blessed with the monster anaconda a light trim will do.
Come well put together. I'm not saying shirt and tie type of shit. I'm just saying don't look fkn sloppy. The girls don't look sloppy so neither should you.
Most of these girls if not all ,are super clean and ready to go. You owe to them and yourself to be just as clean.
3) BE POLITE
I know these girls are sex workers and its easy to look at them like fkn hoes and treat them like one. If you want the gfe experience then treat them like one in the room. What i mean by this is be nice. Lead with your body slow and sensually. Build up to the experience you want. In a car you don't skp from 1st gear to 5th. So same applies here. If you go too fast and the mpa pulls back take it down a notch. You want the mpa to be comfortable with you. Build rapport with the mpa. The more comfortable she is with you, the more she will do.
4) TIP WELL
If the service is good tip well. If the session was basic then give the standard. Some of you guys are so fkn cheap. I'm not saying tip a ton, though some guys do. You'll' be surprised how much an extra 5,10 or 20 goes on top of market rate. This goes a long way and the girl will remember that on your next visit.
I remember one chick i got a bs from. I had 4 twenties and a 5 in my wallet. I figured wth might as well just give it to her. I gave it to her and her smile lit up like crazy. Like she was so fkn happy over 5 Fkn bucks. It felt good to do that gesture and see her reaction. Totally worth the 5 bucks.
5) GO EARLY
If your schedule allows, you go fkn early. The mpas have more energy for a better massage and are more enthusiastic earlier in the day. Avoid going at late hours if you can because near the end of the day they are just tired and waiting to go home.
One time i went to a spa at 7:30 to check one of the girls on my rotation. Yo she was tired AF!!!! She literally went through 11 guys. She kept yawning and her massage was lacking serious power. It was pure shiatsu soft bullshit. I came for deep tissue bitch..lol. Anyway I cut the bullshit massage short , we ended up naked, cuddling and making out. After 15 mins she passed out ...LOLOLOLOL! Dumb bitch..kidding!! She was exhausted. I mean i can't complain as it was serious dfk but i came for the massage. She said i didn't have to tip her. I still tried to give her $50 bucks for the half hour but she refused and said next time. I went to the boss after and told her i don't think itโs a good idea for these chicks to see that many guys. The boss bitch said sorry and gave me an extra bottle of water. .Like what the fk am i gonna do with 2 bottles of water bitch LOL!!!
The service just lacks after a certain number of guys the mpa goes through. I mean imagine an mpa wacking off 11 fkn dicks...wtf!!! Go early!!!
5) DO YOUR RESEARCH
There's a lot of information out there on who provides what. A lot of you guys may be looking for a great massage, a great tease, a fantastic body slide etc. Do the research and ask credible sources, watch out for the shills though. There's a ton of them on here.
If anyone would like to add suggestions or have stories to add regarding mileage pls reply. I would love to hear them.
1) BE IN SHAPE
So first off you mention being in shape - Let me tell you all horn dogs, not true.. Luckily I have had many hot main stream gfs in my life to know this ain't true and the fact that you, me and half the planet would not be here if chicks didn't give it up to the less than pristine male bodies out there.
Look at the statistics of over weight people out there. 60% of the population now.
So what you are telling the guys on massage planet who don't work out, who don't have a pristine body is, don't bother with this hobby, you wont get anything that Bustanut gets. ha ha.
Is that what you are saying? Why don't you constitute what is in shape and what is not.... Stating in shape means different things to different people dude.......
and most spa girls imo, don't have an issue unless you are extremely overweight.
FFS. if chicks didn't ding dong dudes who were out of shape, maybe half the population would not be here.
2) HYGIENE
Spray a good cologne. None of this shoppers drug mart cheap ass shit you say.
Well well, it just so happens that Shoppers does supply great cologne and have personally had spa attendants rank my faves after I bought it at Shoppers. Polo, Hermes, Jean Guy.. (insert curveball now).
And an old fave from years past said Kouros was her fave cologne for guys. Givenchy, Tom Ford are a few others and what I say about cologne is from my own personal observations and the girls opinions. But you don't have any experience with that do ya?
I don't remember a post where you said such and such girl was head over heals for your choices. Have you mentioned that before? My bad if I didn't catch that.
Monster Anaconda.. WFT does that have to do with hygiene?
You could have said for those of you that grow hair well. But yet, you had to write in moster anaconda as like that has anything to do with grooming.
Dumb fuck.......
Groom yourself you say.. So what about dudes who wear beards everyday? Are you saying they cant the Bustapimple experience if they choose not to shave, cut their fingernails and toenails.
More power to em and send them over to Bellaggio where the famous Lucy is. And while your at it Bustapimple, tell Lucy to shave that forest she got going on down under.
And tell her to grow an ass while your at it you fucking dumb ass.
And one other thing dudddddddddde.......
While your at giving advice, why don't you tell some of these popular MPA's to wash before they start work. Less some stinky pussy shit from a few.
I mean go in the bathroom and spend 5 minutes before you come into the room.
An ex of mine always did this every time before we got busy. Day or night.
From my own experience, MPA's can get lazy, or have a shitty attitude when they come to work,.
Even the best MPA's have their moments with bad hygiene. (Especially places that are busy).
3) BE POLITE
You want the mpa to be comfortable with you. Build rapport with the mpa. The more comfortable she is with you, the more she will do.
So this is your guarantee? Tell us your experiences about how the MPA was so comfortable with you and gave you more mileage... and how if she is not comfortable with you, walk out
half way through the session.
How do you know an MPA is comfortable with you?
4) TIP WELL
And the main reason I jumped on this thread because you fail to distinguish between semi-legit, semi this or holistic. DUMB ASS!.
Why people listen to you is a big?
You basically just lumped in every spa with your statement throwing off the newbies who are only into semi services or semi holistic or holistic... i.e. professionals and other. Club Dynasty etc..
And as the crow flies.
So take your wookie ways, your sunglasses at night and big nose and ask yourself, are you yo... oooo GOD's gift to women?
You'll' be surprised how much an extra 5,10 or 20 goes on top of market rate. This goes a long way and the girl will remember that on your next visit.
FFS, If I'm thinking about 5, 10, 20 bucks, I'm not thinking the right things during my spa visit.
But guys like you who write threads like this. Like XTC, are a dime a dirty dozen MF....... and if you be worrying about dimes and nickels, maybe you should try another hobby.
5) GO EARLY
While much can be said for calling ahead, most the time I just show up and if she's busy, I leave or wait 15 minutes max.
Just my own personal choice.
One time i went to a spa at 7:30 to check one of the girls on my rotation. Yo she was tired AF!!!! She literally went through 11 guys.
There have been more than a few times I went to the spa wanting to see my fave, I ended spending 4 hours in the girls room watching the cummings and goings.
She ended giving me her home address and that turned into some magical experiences with her and her friends that became magical experiences.
Lock the doors type of magic...
So fuck me with your thread dude. Are you a semi-legit rookie?
PS So all in all out, everything you just said is the gospel of / on / or about Massage Planet?
Or maybe your just someone n between trying his best to make the world go round?
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